She makes me wonder wha forever feels like.

She makes me want to lay my head in her lap and melt my problems away.

She makes me wonder if she is what heaven feels like.

As she fits into the grooves of my soul.

She fills me like water in a bowl

She is

.....TheGift

The Ice Prince's Secrets

I wish My closet was clean
But we all make bad decisions.

Even though I never meant to hurt her, my concience isn't crystal clear.

I tried to do right by her, but my actions didn't say much.

I told her the truth, but she told herself a lie.

She's dead to me now and she doesn't know why

But I miss her just the same. I miss her just the same. I miss her just the same.

....TheGift

EyE dance with the devil

I heard them before I saw them. I smelled them before I felt them. I felt them before they swung.....I counted 2 sets of footprints. I heard them muttering thier plan as I passed them. They intended to rob me. ME! canyou believe that shit? How you gone rob Fort Knox? I cursed the fact that I wasnt carrying my knives with me. Wrong time to leave the house withouth em. I checked my person for makeshift weapons. Front pockets?Nothing. Back Pockets? Nope.

I wanted to go for my backpack and pretend I was packing heat but they were to close. All I had was two pens in my shirt pocket.....I guess bieng a writer is gonna pay off another way today. Most pansy authors carry around "Notebooks" today but I'm oldschool. I'm lost if I dont hear the scribble aof a pen working its way down a pad.

I turned around quickly and said "Can I help you gentlemen?" knowing that my candid response would throw them off gaurd. "Yeah" one said "You can help us to that bookbag" before he had the sentence all the way out of his mouth I struck. First I dropped low to the ground and then I struck him in his solar plexus with both fists. I waited in my dropped postion to see if I had made the right decision.

I had decided that the shorter one would be the easiest one to drop and as he lay on the ground gsping for air I knew I had mad e the right decision. The other man was a head taller than me and didnt look like he could be intimidated or caught by a sucker punch. I grinned. This was gonna be fun. I wondered if this man knew yet that he had encountered another wolf...

He circled me. I circled him. we glared at each other. then I stod up straight and removed my pens from my shirt pocket. Daring him to strike while I seemed vulnerable. as I popped the caps off I said to him in a clear voice "You know in the far east, they would gauge a mans eyes out for stealing." "What you gonna do with those pens? Write me a ticket?" I chuckled. He still didnt know enough to be scared. I felt sorry for him really. "No." I said "one is for you and the other is for your friend." As I said 'friend' the man oon the ground stirred and started to get up

"That freakin Hurt! Youre gonna pay for that!" he started to rush me again. I could see that the other man knew his once fallen comrade didnt have a chance, but he just let him go anyway. Oh well, so much for "Friends". I swept to the side to dodge his first attack with ease while simultaneoulsy swinging my right elbow to the back of his head. He went sprawling to the floor again.
Big guy saw this as his opportunity and pounced...directly into the same elbow which had dispatched his friend. He never saw it coming. A little blook leaked from his chin where I had connected. I was too distrated by this to realize that he had snuck his Ham sized fists into my personal space and landed to blows to my ribs. ouch. good one. I was hoping he would be good.

As I rolled off of his punches I decided that it was time to end this, so I ended it. On his next advance, I dropped into a crouch. and Waited. He waited. I waited. His friend was silent. I made my move, sweeping my right leginto his knee and hearing the satisfiying crunch I was seeking. Then jumped up and landed one of my weaponized writing instruments into his right eye.

Do you kow what it feels like to stab an eye? Imagine a meatball in Spaghetti sauce. except sliperry. His scream was earshattering. I was sure that someone would report that scream as I made my exit. I thought about saying a few last clever words as I left, ya know like in the movies? but I decided that his eyepatch or glass eye would be adequate poetic justice..........TheGift

Jay-Hacked Part I: Random Thoughs of a Precocious Wanderer

A Walking Corpse
A body with no soul
Well maybe a soul, but not a clean one....
This one's tarnished...
Old and worn and full of holes
Stains from where regret gripped my conscience and wouldn't let go
The more i wiped the bigger the stains got
Don't really mind them so much now
People say I never had a heart
Thats not true....
I had one....
It worked fine....
But time took its toll
Lovers came and gone, and took pieces of it with them
What was once something whole, was now mishapen and grotesque
It made no sense to use it
Something as mangled as that could not possibly be of any use...
So I cut it out...
And buried it in my backyard, in hopes another one will grow
They say thses things take
I'm in no rush
I cut out my emotions too, and buried them beside it
Waiting til the time is right to unearth them
So far I feel fine....
In the physical sense
I suppose you can't really "feel" if you have nothing to feel with
Im not really living anymore
Just drifting
Waiting for signs of life from that little patch of dirt......

I saw it die.
I watched it.
Dealing the death blow myself, I curved my banked strength
to every length to watch my heart fade away.
Blazed it full of bullet spray
from silver metal fragment and
Fractions of sinister plastics.

I destroyed my heart.
and its only crippled.
Cuz whenshe showed up, it beat. Once, just to let me know
It was still there.

It is not rehabilitated.

But its still ticking.

A trinket

I know I've been neglecting this blog :( My bad yo! Here's a lil trinket for you....

-As I lay her down, she whimpers, ever so softly, as if bieng parted with my electric touch for even a moment caused her pain. She parts her lips ever so slightly and whispers "come here". I fall into her gravitational pull. As I kiss her our worlds collide,we shift tectonic plates, we hurricane,we dance on the edges of our tongues forever, and she is so perfect.She is perfect like poured chocolate.

Love,

...TheGift

I just remembered

I had forgotten.
I had forgotten why
I never let you and I
Get specific.
Why I allowed my other
To drift amidst a sea
Of non specifics.

But
I just remembered.

I just remembered that
Everything U and I
Or he and she shared
Is hated.
I just recalled that the
Walls I tore down for
You are reinstated.
Re- enforced with hatred
For all things we used to
Hold sacred.

I just remembered you on
An Ice cream scoop.

I recalled you as a loop
De loop.

I saw you spread out on
Pink sheets, I recalled you
As I bent a knee and I hated it.

So I tried in vain to escape it.

I'm grateful it ended before it really began because if I
Had died inside in later years I might have hated sand.

If I had taken you on that
Moonlit picnic I would have
Hated the stars because every
Shooting asteroid would have reopened a scar.

I'm elated that we never took that morning hike because then I'd hate the sunrise. I'm glad your eye color was normal because if they had been unique I could have hated strange eyes.

As is. I'll forget again.
Tomorrow. But today I wear a black band for my sorrows

....TheGift

In the spirit of the Secret Gifts Concept, Which is, me giving you guys something of value, I give you something close to my heart and soul... Sonic Adventure 2. The classic sega genesis game on a PC. If you want it I will E-mal it to you. Just comment with your e-mail address.It is SO AWESOME!!!! now I digress. Even if you dont want this gift, Ive got more gifts coming, for now, the gift of Writing.....

I wouldnt mind love
If it was Mind love.
If I could love the curvatures of your Mind, love.
If I could read your poetry
as it takes me to an exstacy mentality.
Please, give me, your peices, in peices.
I want to hear your songs
read your books
Read your Blogs
Not be concerned about your looks.

I wouldnt mind loving your mind, love.
Would you mind loving mine?
*****************************************

This blog is tentatively for my stabs at everything
about me that I dont show everyone
(Which is weird cuz anyone can read a blog....)

So you guys should know that I am foraying into the feild of
writing fiction. I've got a short story in the works and
you guys will be the first to see the finished product ;)

Till then, Keep giving!

I think its Important to note here that this blog is filled with exclusive material from yours truly. I write everywhere on the internet, from facebook to myspace to youtube but this blog right here? This blog right here nikka? This that nunu shit.


Twighlight is broken.
"Shawty could have been the best"
Never watched the proposal
***********

Everything she touched, is tainted. So I burned it all. Deleted contacts and changed my eyesight like removing contacts. I switched to my Head nigga in charge glasses.

Everything she touched is tainted so I torched it all.
Its all tainted with folly memories. So all that I copy pasted into me I trashbinned. All that once made me happy became hasbeens. Instant destruction but results were everlastin'. I quit feeding my love and it starved like it was fastin'. Then I started blastin' at the folly memories so they could never pretend to be the mockery they wanted to be. I removed tags, pictures and facebook notes. I destroyed files music and myspace quotes. I tacked a virus onto the part of my iris that considered her my eyes apple and returned my view of the world to black and white.

That's why I didn't enjoy twilight. How selfish do you have to be to taint an entire movie? I don't know if I hated it because she was in it? Or hated it because I hated it. I just kniw its tainted.

Can't bump certain Drake songs like I did. That kid. All I hear D say when the hook play is:
"Shawty could been the best, Could have been the best Could have been the best. Coulda been the best I ever had...."

Oh the waisted potential. Shit I think I'm mental......

Broken Poet Speaks

So here is my first gift.
Those who know me and sympathize with my cause
know that I HATE love poetry.
Its all so done!
However I do have a few freinds and sisters who do love poetry that I like
and they have inspired moi.

So here is a little taste of my Passion Poetry
Tell me what you think ;)


She so daaAaamn..

She's like.
She be,I swear.
She so, effective.
For I can only assume that her Objective
is to render my speech innefective.
It has has to be that she set out purposefully
to make it so I could not speak.
Or breathe.
Or see.
This can't just be a side effect.
This. Is premeditated.
Its gotta be.

My calls call out to her. We want her.
We want our minds to be mind.
Bodies to be body and spirit to be energy
as we transcend the limitations of this galaxy
dammit I want her next to me.
For some reason, Somethings of mine still carry her scent.
Or maybe the memory is still attached....

Her brown skin is a container to keep my energies in
as I transfer my desire, into her thighs and deposit
my love, into her eyes and breathe my lust,
into her lungs and give her my passion, with my toungue......

pt.1